Just Because I Want To
And the battle of hobby allocations.
Last week was my birthday. Last week I also wanted to do more sashiko stitching. but I kept telling myself No, and ‘you have too many projects in progress,’ and the project set up either takes a lot of time (drawing a grid/pattern) or takes money (to buy pre-printed fabric). No, no, no. ‘Just finish something you have already started, you don’t need a new project’ - you don’t need a new hobby - you just need to stop already.
That is how the conversation had been going, but on my birthday, I decided that I would gift myself the time and permission to start a sashiko stitching project. And, in truth, a project that takes at least 30 minutes to set up before you even start stitching is not something I have energy and time for most days (specifically, energy and time happening in the same moment). So, I found a linen scrap I got from a friend’s studio clean out, and I printed out some sashiko patterns, got my lightbox (and it only took 4 tries to find the right cord for it), and I traced my pattern. I found the sashiko thread I purchased 8 years ago, and the needles that went with it, plus a leather thimble that I made the week before while I was working on my son’s pants.
And then I got started. And it was so lovely. It felt luxurious to do a thing I wanted, just because I wanted it. I have been thinking about that, how “I want to do it” feels like such a flimsy reason to do something. And I really did think of it as a birthday gift to myself, allowing myself to start something new.
Over the past decade, I have taken plenty of inspiration from the sashiko traditions and techniques, but this was the first time I really tried to followed the method step by step - even trying to get the fast stitching technique that I have admired & envied for years. Its hard training your hands to work in a new way, but I am getting the hang of pushing the needle against the thimble.
I stitched on my birthday, and then I got some stitching in while we watched a movie, while waiting at gymnastics, and at night before bed. And I finished it pretty quickly. I ran out of thread, but managed to make it look like a design choice, and I love this little cloth. No idea what I do with it, but rubbing my hands along it is satisfying enough for the moment.
Your work feels like love in physical form. I just came across a kid's sock that had been darned... and since I have never darned a sock I realized Ms. Susan must have darned it at some point. And I felt taken care of, from across the span of a year? Two?
It’s beautiful! 😍